not because they're weak,
but because they've been strong
for too long"
Somewhere along the lines here, I feel I've lost my way. The strive for perfection seems to be clouding my judgement. But what is perfection in parenting anyway? Does it even exist?
We don't suddenly gain infinite amounts of patience, or become completely selfless the minute we birth a child from our bodies. Particularly if patience and selflessness weren't amongst our pre-baby having attributes. It's like we're all expected to be super mums, we're expected to have it all together, we berate ourselves when we lose our cool, and we're made to feel like failures if we don't absolutely love every aspect of motherhood.
Becoming a mother is absolutely the greatest thing I've ever done in my life, but it is in no way something that I enjoy 100% of the time. Nath and I are on our own... and I mean, ON OUR OWN. We don't have help. No grandparents around, no aunts, uncles or cousins to help. We don't have a cleaner, we don't have a nanny or a cook, I can't even convince Nath to join he Thermomix revolution! So, suffice it to say that often times, life is really HARD.
I break down...
Why? Because I'm human. I have emotions, I'm tired... I'm BEYOND tired. I'm not used to having to give everything of myself to someone else, and I'm not used to putting myself last. I'm still not there yet, and after 3.5 years of practice, it doesn't look like I will be any time soon. I don't believe that I'm unique in my failings here. I don't believe I'm the only one to cry. It's just another one of those things that we don't talk about, that we're not supposed to admit to.
"There's no way to be a perfect mother,
but a million ways to be a good one..."
It's my personal opinion, or belief, that aspiring to perfection in motherhood is futile. Perfection doesn't exist, or alternatively, perfection is in the eye of the beholder... It's as unique as each and every one of us. Society's vision of perfection doesn't exist, but within your four walls, your vision of perfection may. Each and every time I fall down, I try to remember the monumental task that we're undertaking here... raising small humans. It's not meant to be easy. It's ok to fall down every now and then. It's ok to cry, it's ok to feel like you've been pushed to your limits, it's ok to recognise that you have them... It's ok to admit that you're having a shit time of it... and it's ok to ask for help. To ask for help BEFORE you find yourself falling.
Behind the blog...
‘The Mummysomniac’ is a lifestyle, motherhood and most recently, pregnancy blog, founded in 2015 by Kirsty McKenzie. She’s a mum of three, blogging about the highs and lows of motherhood, with a straight forward and honest approach, as well as a little bit of humour. Kirsty is passionate about sharing the realities of #MumLife, not the cookie cutter, high gloss version